Daily Thoughts #3

Dear Diary,

Had a compliment from boss today; said I was the first (maybe one of the first) persons in his working life to be completely honest with him. I told him that I had a job interview in KL and I wanted to ask for a leave. Well, he agreed yet he was shocked not because of the fact that there is a chance I might leave the hotel, but rather that someone didn't lie to him about job interviews. He did warn me about being completely honest with other people because the honesty could bite back at you. Kinda agree with it, but I am careful about who I'm honest with. Besides, it's not like I'm removing every single data once I resign or something. No point lying about it and then suddenly sending a resignation letter by surprise. Now that's gonna bring a hell of a lot of lectures when it happens.

A motorcycle crashed into my car today. It was jammed, and I think the motorist didn't see us stopping while he was swerving here and there, and didn't have time to avoid my car. Luckily, Kia Spectra's body frame is plastic so it doesn't dent easily. There'll be scratches but very minor ones. He left a lot of mud on the car though. Well, he's fine and hurriedly left the scene with his wife (I think she scraped her arm a little). Meh. Car not damaged, no point making a scene or asking for money. First accident alone. Thank God that there were no serious injuries to the person or the car. His side view mirror for the bike was broken though.

Seems like KL life's gonna be a challenge according to my friends. I still want to give it a shot if that's what it takes to get to my new dream. Never try, never know. There's always Penang if this don't work out. All I gotta do is find any vacancies or go through the head-hunting. But then again, I always think about my local church and whether I should stay. But I gotta build my career too while I'm still at that "growing in career" age.

I've been getting tired very fast these few days. Am I getting old?

Goodnight.

Daily Thoughts #2

Dear Diary,

Damn. Didn't get to update last night due to fatigue. It's really hard to handle hotel work now. Working like mad during the day (sometimes), and then having to stay back for some function really kills the energy. Came back home, I actually slept while watching a video on Youtube. Luckily I woke up in time to bathe and actually get into bed.

Had a call from FlyFM yesterday. They actually read my resume and want to interview me! It really feels good when someone sees the work I've done and wants to see if I can be a part of their team. If I really do get a job there, I'm gonna need to start getting used to KL life and its hecticness. Hella-lot different from Alor Star. Nah, ain't gonna even call it Setar. It used to be Star, and I prefer it that way.

Shoulder's slowly working back to normal. Though sleep's still an issue as sleeping face down kinda hurts the shoulder a little. No idea why. At least I could drum again. Really felt awesome playing Yours Forever by Hillsong United just now. Maybe one day we can really jam that song fully.

My eyes are tired. But yet, I can't sleep yet. I really need to fix my feelings and my head. Somehow I feel like I like a girl, but part of me tells me that it ain't gonna work out. Too much differences. Well, that happened once. Guess that's why I have a slight fear of it happening again. But on the other side of the coin, kinda feel lonely. Sigh. Can't you just get here faster. Take the train if it's jammed on the road then.

Gotta start skipping again.

Goodnight.

Daily Thoughts #1

Dear Diary,

I decided to start writing in a blog again as a way to express my thoughts whenever it can't be expressed to anyone else. Better let it out somehow than keeping it in. Since I've been giving that advice to others, can't do the opposite.

Lot of things have been happening. Got a job, got new responsibilities, friends' lives have been changing. I saw a dead guy face to face. Suicide death. Kinda horrid but somehow I could stay cool (a little bit panic at first, but it's normal) and was able to get the proper authorities to settle the issue. Strange that other people have haunted memories after seeing "it" but I could even sleep well (hell, I even dreamed about other stuff on that same night). Wonder if there's something wrong with me; or am I just unique in that particular section of life?

Close friend of mine's going through a tough time after a very harsh break-up. Doing all I can to make sure she stays happy even though that could prove dangerous. Happiness seems to be one of the ways to hide the pain or even suppress the negative emotions. But when you're angry, you tend to make harsh or rash judgements as well. Meh. As a friend, I'm just gonna be there for her whenever needed (I've been through what she's going through anyway. Not exactly the same, but similar).

Almost had another job opportunity with an International company, only to find out their appointment is on the same date as my family vacation to Bali. Balls. And I thought I could get out of my current situation sooner than expected. But like what mum said, "If it's meant to be, it'll happen". I really want a better job with a better pay though. At least I could get my own camera and go crazy with it. Maybe sell some stock photos while I'm at it. 

Guess that's all for tonight. Can't stay up too late or I'll get another headache at work tomorrow.

P.S. I really need to get back to writing and making my song better. Can't procrastinate forever, man.

Good morning/Good night.